My Heart Grows Faint

Monday was a bad day, yesterday was a good day, today I’m really struggling. It’s really tough for me right now. I couldn’t bear the thought of getting up this morning. I had very little intention of keeping going with my recovery. Some little glimmer of determination forced me to listen to Christ Alone, Cornerstone. I then opened my bible. I opened it at Ecclesiastes chapter 1, which is titled Everything is Meaningless. That didn’t help! Feeling rather frustrated and desperate for comfort I turned to the Psalms. I opened at Psalm 61. This is what it says:

Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe. I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of your wings. For you, God, have heard my vows; you have given me the heritage of those who fear your name. (Psalm 61:1-5 NIV) 

This spoke to me at quite a deep level. I’m growing quite fond of the Psalms. I’ve not been a fan of them previously. My spoke to me because it feels like my heart grows faint, through a combination of mental ill-health and difficult circumstances. It feels as though I’ve sunk down into the all too familiar pit of despair that I often find myself in. So the answer is found in these words too: ‘lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For you have been my refuge…‘  Abba is faithful, constant and consistent in His love for me and will bring me through this. In Him alone I trust. 

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