I've lost count of the number of days we've been on lockdown. I doubt that it will be anywhere near normal for a long time yet. I'm trying not to complain, because there have been so many benefits to this time. But I can't wait to see friends and family again. I miss church, mostly.… Continue reading Why so difficult?
September is my least favourite month of the year - every year. It's the one month of the year that I wish I could sleep through. Today marks the one year anniversary since the last time I tried to commit suicide. It's also the 6 month anniversary since the last time I cut myself and… Continue reading Conflicted Anniversaries
I'm not very well. I'm writing this blog post from my bed. I'm not fully sure what's wrong - possibly flu. I don't feel too poorly. My sore throat and cough from Saturday and Sunday have cleared up and I don't have any other symptoms apart from feeling achy and extremely tired. I'm more concerned… Continue reading Concerned
Today I'm trying to convince myself that there's more to me than my diagnoses. But, I'm finding it a struggle. It's hard to see myself as anything worthwhile when I have had the outcome from my mental health assessment back in early August. This is who they say I am: Personality Disorder Specified by Traits… Continue reading There’s more to me than this…
It's difficult to distinguish between what is the real, 'created' me and what is the 'constructed' me - or as Brennan Manning describes, 'the IMPOSTOR'. I think I struggle with this because at the moment I see me as BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder)/EUPD (Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder) Hannah. This 'me' also has other psychological issues… Continue reading The Real Me